Feeling of Abandonment

Was it just my childhood emotional luggage or was it a normal psychological reaction to situation I was in? What ever it was I seemed to be enjoying my own pity party. Woke up at 6 am with a sinus headache. Yeah, I have been suffering from pollen allergy since summer that briefly passed by. Went back to sleep. Opened my eyes again its 7:10 am . I felt the house spinning. “No, I am not going to work in this condition.” I adamantly insisted Tried hard to go back to sleep again. This went on for countless of time when I finally got up at  9:24 am. I felt so weak, like a 100 year old man. My blood pressure reading was elevated again. Been feeling this way all day. The pain killer I took helped a little. I felt so helpless, so alone. I know I am too old to do that but it once again made me recall how my mom took care of me when I was sick. Hot meal and fruit juices. This time it’s just my imaginary tea. Me myself and I having a pity tea party.